Post by Val Emerald on Aug 1, 2021 17:04:21 GMT -5
The jew producer: Hello, Fanfic readers and welcome to another episode of "the change up". In this episode, our very own Toot Braunstein will join another reality show to help her lose weight while one of our new housemates, a twelve year old girl named abbi and wooldoor try to murder another new housemate named Mr donkey to see if the new housemates can come back from the dead after they get killed. Drawn together and its characters belong to Dave jeser and Matt Silverstein, Double Hemm, Roughdraft studios, and Comedy partners. the twelve year old girl and donkey are original characters owned by the author of this fanfiction. The rest of the cartoons making cameos in this episode are all owned by their respective companies. Enjoy.
Set in the morning after The change up, The Housemates (Sans Captain Hero, Abbi, and Mr Donkey) all wake up hungover, slowly and groggily walk to the kitchen, and sit on the table and counter.
Foxxy:(Confessional)(Hungover) Lordy. I don'ts know why we's getting drunk and hungover. We's all fucked up.
As the housemates start having breakfast, Mr Donkey sourly wakes up and enters the kitchen to sit down on the table far away from the housemates.
Mr Donkey:(Confessional)(Surly) Huh! Serves those assholes right. Those new cartoons in here are a bunch of boozing partying dumb asses.
Abbi(With magenta hair) then enters the kitchen. She then sits down by the table next to toot.
Abbi:(Politely) Good morning, Toot. How are you today?
Toot:(Surly towards abbi) Ah, Fuck off.
Abbi:(Confessional) I've noticed that people in here got groggy and irritable the morning after a night of drinking excessive alcohol. I've also noticed that excessive alcohol can make people more impulsive and express their hidden emotions. At least that depraved superhero is now out of the picture.
The hungover captain hero then enters the kitchen.
Hero:(Groggy) Good morning, all you sexy people. boy was I fucking wasted last night.
Abbi then notices captain hero which shocks her.
Abbi:(Confessional)(Shocked) Wha... Why... HOW??!!
Abbi then frantically approaches the hungover wooldoor who's leaning on the counter drawers.
Wooldoor:(Groggily noticing abbi and smiling at her) Oh good morning, New friend. How are you?
Abbi: Wooldoor, Can we talk privately?
Wooldoor: Sure.
After breakfast, Abbi and Wooldoor go upstairs to the hallway.
Wooldoor:(Getting more chipper) So abbi, What do you wanna talk about?
Abbi: Do you know that immoral superhero?
Wooldoor: Yeah, That's captain hero. What about him?
Abbi: He carried me to his room drunk and was about to have his way with me against my will, But I killed him in self defense. I cleaned up the carpet, The Body, Everything. Yet he comes back to life unscathed by the next morning. How could he have possibly come back to life like that? Could it be because he has superpowers that can do that or what?
Wooldoor: Oh, That's just normal in our household. All of us died several times yet we always come back to life by the next episode. Sometimes even sooner. Ling-Ling often dies the most.
Abbi:(Flabbergasted) Is this house cursed?
Wooldoor:(Smiles) Maybe. It would be fun. (Raises his arms in the air with glee) Whee!
Abbi:(Shocked) I can't believe this... Would the same thing apply to me and Mr donkey?
Wooldoor: I don't know, You could both try.
Abbi: Wait a minute. I've got an idea. In order to see if Mr donkey and I could come back to life, I'm going to use mr donkey as a test kill.
Wooldoor:(Gasps in horror) You're going to k-k-k-k-kill Mr donkey?! But I'm his biggest fan!
Abbi:(Sadly) I apologize for telling you this, Wooldoor but Mr donkey seems like a bitter old individual who would rather be put out of his misery than live another day in this seemingly chaotic household.
Wooldoor:(Hesitant) Well, I've always wanted to make my idol happy and since killing him would make him happy...
Abbi: do you want to help me kill him?
Wooldoor:(Suddenly turns chipper) Okay!
Jew Producer:(Announcing through the speakers) Attention housemates! As a special welcome to the new housemates, we are bringing you all a brand new couch!
Most of the housemates soon cheer.
Hero: Alright!
Foxxy: Bling bling!
Wooldoor: Whee!
Spanky: Sweet!
Mr Donkey:(Confessional)(Sourly) Hmph! I would have been much happier if I had gotten a recliner to myself instead of these young dumb asses getting a fucking couch.
Later, the new purple futuristic looking couch gets delivered to the household living room. Everyone (Sans Mr Donkey) observes it in joy.
Hero:(Pushing everyone out of the way) Out of the way, Dumb asses! I get first dibs! (Immediately sits on the couch which arouses him.) oh yeah. This couch feels so sexy.
Foxxy:(Sits on the couch which makes her smile in content) Lordy, This couch...
Clara:(Sighs in content as she sits on the couch) It's so wonderful to sit on this beautiful piece of new furniture before somebody else sins on it.
Toot:(Excited) Ooh! Let me try it! (Sits on the couch which immediately breaks. Most of the housemates then angrily groan at toot.)
Spanky:(Furious) Oh I can't believe this! Toot broke the couch with her fat ass before I could even shit on it!
Hero:(Angrily cries) Fatty foopa ruined everything!
Toot:(In tears) Guys, I'm sorry. I'm-
Ling-Ling:(Angrily in japorean) No one wants your apology, Submarine!
Wooldoor:(Frowns at Toot) Yeah! Go away! No one likes fat chicks!
Abbi then angrily glares at Wooldoor which literally makes him shrink.
Wooldoor:(Chipmunk voice) Sorry, Abbi. Sorry, Toot.
Toot then cries as she runs upstairs to the girls bedroom as Abbi, Foxxy, and Xandir watch her in sympathy. Foxxy and Xandir then head upstairs to the bedroom and see toot sitting and crying on her bed.
Foxxy:(Approaches toot and puts her hand on her shoulder) Tootie, We's sorry for all that bullying.
Xandir:(Also approaches Toot and puts his hand on her other shoulder) And It's not your fault, Sweetie. The new couch was Probably just very fragile.
Toot:(Sadly) No, Everyone was right. I'm the fat bitch who ruins everything. Maybe everyone's better off without me.
Toot then sobs again.
Xandir:(Assuring) Toot, That's not true. I still like you and maybe jesus likes you too.
Toot:(Scoffs) Have you seen the way jesus looked at me in fat camp? (Sadly sighs) I wish there was some way I could be less fat...
Toot then sees a magazine on her bed near her, Picks it up, And reads it.
Toot:(Reading in curiosity) Hey, What's "the fat shed" about?
Foxxy:(Nonchalantly) Oh, It's this reality tv show where fat ass contestants get on the show to lose weight.
Toot:(Excited) Ooh! That sounds perfect! I wanna join the show!
Xandir:(Concerned) Toot, I'm not sure if that's a good idea.
Foxxy:(To Toot) Yeah, Most of them contestants gains their weight back after the show.
Toot:(Determined) I don't Care!! If it's the quickest way to be less fat, Then count me in! I'm going to be on the fat fucking shed!
Meanwhile, Abbi and Wooldoor put a rake with a sharp dart glued on the top side of the handle on the sidewalk.
Abbi: Now Wooldoor, (Points at the dart) This dart glued to the handle is immensely poisonous. So our job is to convince mr donkey to "Go on a walk". While on that walk, He steps on the rake which will wack him while the dart injects his head. Once the dart injects his head...
Wooldoor makes a throat slitting gesture.
Abbi: Exactly.
Abbi and Wooldoor then wait in the bushes for Mr Donkey to come out. However, They soon see pixie and dixie being chased by Mr Jinx which immediately prompts abbi and wooldoor to get the rake out of the way for the cat and mice as they run past the girl and sockbat.
Mr Jinx:(Running and Panting) I hate these meeces to pieces.
Abbi and Wooldoor then put the rake back on the sidewalk and hide in the bushes again. They then see pinocchio skipping on the sidewalk which immediately prompts abbi and wooldoor to get the rake out of the way as pinocchio skips by them.
Pinocchio:(Smiling and waving at Abbi and Wooldoor) Hiya guys! Thanks for getting that weird looking rake out of the way for me!
Abbi and Wooldoor nervously smile and wave at pinocchio.
Abbi: Always a pleasure to help a fellow individual!
Wooldoor:(Whispering) Abbi, This isn't working. Some more people might be walking toward the rake before mr donkey.
Abbi:(Whispering to Wooldoor) You might be right. You may have to convince mr donkey to go on that walk while I watch the rake.
Wooldoor:(Cheerfully whispering to abbi) I'll be right on it.
Wooldoor then heads back inside and sees mr donkey sourly sitting on a white couch.
Wooldoor:(Sing-Song) Hi, Mr Donkey.
Mr Donkey:(Grunts at Wooldoor) What the hell do you want?
Wooldoor:(Cheerful) Would you like to go on a walk today?
Mr Donkey:(Grumpily) No. It's too sunny!
Wooldoor: But the sun makes the whole day beautiful! Plus it might give you a break from us pesky whipper snappers.
Mr Donkey:(Annoyed) No!
Wooldoor: But-
Mr Donkey:(More annoyed) I said no, You little shit! Now fuck off!
Mr Donkey soon literally kicks wooldoor out of the household. Wooldoor then flies into abbi as both of them land on the rake which hits both of them with the dart barely missing them.
Meanwhile, Toot enters the fat shed along with several other fat cartoon characters. A cheerful blonde skinny host in a pink dress then greets them.
Host: Hello contestants! My name is barbie and welcome to the fat shed! Today, All of you are going to weigh in and we'll see how much you weigh now! Who wants to go first?
Heffer Wolfe: I'll do it!
Heffer then gets on the scale and weighs in. He then sees his weight number.
Heffer:(Excited) Wow! That's a huge number! How much money do I win?
Barbie: You don't win any money. The scale just tells you how fat you are.
Heffer: So I don't win any money then?
Homer Simpson then weighs in.
Barbie: So Homer, How does it feel to be a yellow blimp?
Homer: D'oh!
Jay Sherman then weighs in.
Barbie: How does it feel to be so fat and hideous?
Jay:(Annoyed) It stinks!
Barbie: Apparently so does your career.
Toot weighs in next.
Barbie: So Toot, How does it feel to be such a fat cow?
Toot:(Taken aback) Well, Now that you called me that, Not so great...
Barbie: Do you feel in any way ashamed of yourself at all?
Toot: Well yeah. That's why I came on this show.
Barbie: No wonder. You weigh even more than a cow!
Toot:(Starts to cry) Why are you being so cruel?!
Barbie: It's just the truth.
Later, some of the contestants were assigned a flamboyant trainer named bobby while the other contestants (Including Toot) were assigned to a tough and buff woman trainer named julie. All of the contestants later have their first workout with their trainers.
Julie: Now everyone! If you're not puking, Dying, Or randomly losing your limbs, Work your fucking ass off!!!
As everyone has their first workout, Julie keeps working toot to the point where toot starts crying and throwing up in a bucket.
Toot:(Confessional) God! I didn't realize that being on this show would be so hard!!
Meanwhile at the park, Abbi and Wooldoor set a huge boulder hanging on two huge sturdy trees by a remote controlled net above a park bench. They then hide behind one of the trees.
Wooldoor:(Smiling while whispering) So Abbi, What's your plan now?
Abbi: My next plan is that we wait until mr donkey (Points at the bench under the boulder) sits on that bench. When he sits on the bench, Your job (Hands Wooldoor the remote) is to press the red remote button releasing the net and the boulder onto mr donkey. My signal for you to press the remote button is this. (Points at Wooldoor)
Wooldoor:(Cheerful) You got it, Buddy!
Abbi and Wooldoor hide behind each tree while abbi keeps a close eye on the bench. she then sees mr donkey walk toward the bench and sit on it which prompts her to point her finger at Wooldoor.
Wooldoor: Hey Abbi! What's your signal again?
The annoyed abbi points at wooldoor again.
Wooldoor:(Puts his hands on his hips) You know, Abbi. It's very rude to point.
The annoyed mr donkey soon overhears wooldoor which prompts him to get out of the bench and walk away.
Abbi:(Agitated) Wooldoor! Pointing at you was the signal and now we missed mr donkey!
Wooldoor:(Walks towards abbi and stops under the boulder) I'm sorry, Abbi. I forgot the signal. I also forgot what this button does. (Points at the red button on the remote) What does it do again? (Presses the red button which releases the net and boulder which falls on him.)
Abbi:(Worried) Wooldoor! Are you alright?!
Wooldoor:(Strained) I'm fine. Just a little crushed by the whole situation.
the scene cuts to an island guy doing a rim shot.
Meanwhile, After a perilous workout, Toot sits outside of the gym crying.
Toot:(Confessional)(Defeated) Maybe xandir and foxxy are right. Maybe I'm not cut out for this show.
While toot's crying, Julie goes outside and sits down next to toot.
Julie: Hey toot. What's up?
Toot:(Sobbing) Oh julie, I feel like I'm too weak to be on this show. I think I'm gonna quit.
Julie: You know, Toot. For now, You're just a big fat doughnut. But in this show, We are going to figuratively eat you like one. Once you keep being eaten, You're going to look and feel a lot skinnier.
Toot:(Smiles in determination) You know, I don't understand a damn thing you said, But you're right! I'm gonna stay on this show and I'm gonna keep losing the weight!
Julie:(Condescending) That's terrific...
Meanwhile, a recliner is delivered near the household door. A deliveryman soon knocks on the door which was soon opened by xandir.
Xandir: Hello, Can I help you?
Deliveryman: Hello. I've got a recliner for a "Mr Donkey". Are you him?
Xandir:(Kindly) No, But I'll get him right away. (Calls in a sing-songy way) Mr Donkey! There's a recliner for you!
Mr Donkey:(Trudges to the door) A recliner? About fucking time.
As the recliner gets pushed to the living room by the deliveryman, Abbi and Wooldoor hide behind a couch.
Wooldoor:(Whispering) Abbi, How were you able to afford that recliner?
Abbi:(Whispering) Gang money.
Wooldoor: I keep forgetting to ask you this, but why is your hair now magenta? The last time I saw you, Your hair was green.
Abbi: I have to change my hair color after every kill on my duty so that I would be more discreet.
Wooldoor:(Smiles as he continues to whisper) Okay. so What's our next plan?
Abbi: Before Mr Donkey sits on the recliner, I'll put (picks up a purple snake beside her that hisses) This venomous snake behind (Picks up a white cushion on her other side) this cushion.
Wooldoor:(Quietly gasps) Abbi, You're so brilliant.
Xandir:(Walks by the couch and sees abbi and wooldoor which prompts him to smile at them.) Hi guys. Are you both playing a game?
Abbi: Something like that.
Xandir:(Touched) Aww! How cute! I'll let you two little buddies play some more.
Xandir then walks away from them which relieves them. Abbi sneakily crawls to the recliner and puts the snake (With the cushion in front of him) on it. The unsuspecting mr donkey soon sits on the recliner which prompts the delighted abbi and wooldoor to smile, wink, and give thumbs up to each other. Unfortunately, Mr Donkey then farts which makes the snake frantically slither away from the recliner which frustrates abbi. As Mr Donkey leaves to go upstairs to the bathroom, Abbi and Wooldoor walk to the recliner.
Abbi:(Enraged) I can't believe this! How could an individual as old, bitter, and frail as mr donkey be so difficult to assassinate?! (Kicks the recliner button in fury until the recliner kicks both her and wooldoor up to the ceiling. Spanky then walks by and sees them.)
Spanky: Huh, I never realized that we had a chandorkleer! (Laughs at abbi and wooldoor)
As Spanky leaves the living room, They both fall from the ceiling and land on an unsuspecting Ling-Ling which makes him cry out in pain.
Wooldoor:(Guilty) Sorry, Ling-Ling.
Ling-Ling:(Japorean)(Angrily) What the fuck, Man?! (Dies)
Abbi:(Concerned as she sees ling-ling's corpse) Will he be alright?
Wooldoor:(Smiles) Oh yeah. He comes back healthy as a horse every time.
Meanwhile in the fat shed, Toot starts losing weight and getting better at the workouts which impresses the trainers and other contestants. Later, Toot's sanity starts to slip.
Toot:(Confessional)(Psychotically smiling) Sure, I've been deprived from eating something delicious for so long. Sure, I've only been allowed to eat sandwiches that taste like cardboard and salads that have no flavor whatsoever. But at least I'm getting less fat and hideous. At least not everyone will hate me for being fat now...
Later in the gym, Toot creepily and slowly enters the gym which disturbs the trainers and contestants.
Toot:(Smiles creepily) Hello Julie...
Julie:(Disturbed) Hello Toot. Are you ready to work out?
Toot: You bet your fucking ass I am! I wanna go to the machine that's the most intense!!
Julie:(Concerned) Uh, Are you sure you don't want to start with something easier like weights of the rowing machine?
Toot: NO!! The more intense the machine, The more skinnier I'll be!! (Sees the biggest stair master in the gym) I wanna use that stair master right now!!
Julie: Toot, I don't think you should-
Toot: I SAID RIGHT NOW!!!
Julie reluctantly lets toot use the biggest stair master. As toot starts walking on the stair master, She starts to get even more manic.
Toot:(Maniacal) More speed! More intensity! More!!!
Julie:(Worried) But toot! You-
Toot: NOW!!!!
Julie then reluctantly turns up the speed and intensity on the stair master which eventually makes toot trip and fall from the stair master as it loses control and suddenly flies away through the ceiling which horrifies everyone.
Toot:(Weary) So did I lose all the weight yet? (Collapses on the floor)
Later in the weigh in, Toot didn't lose enough weight which makes her team lose. her teammates then look at toot in fear.
Fred Flintstone:(Confessional) I'm voting toot out because her head is a little yabba dabba doozy.
Later, Toot's teammates all vote toot out which eliminates her.
Barbie:(Condescending) I'm sorry, Toot. You are now eliminated from the fat shed. How do you feel?
Toot:(Desperate) But I can't be eliminated yet! I haven't lost enough weight to get everybody to like me again...
Later as toot heads back to the household, The housemates throw her a "Sorry You've been eliminated" party. During the party, Wooldoor notices abbi sadly standing and staring down at the floor which prompts him to approach her in concern.
Wooldoor: Hi Abbi. Got anymore plans?
Abbi:(Defeated) Wooldoor, I give up. Mr Donkey proved to be too difficult of an assassination for us. Now I won't know our certain fate...
Wooldoor:(Assuring) Aw don't worry, Abbi. A lot of crazy fucked up things happen in this household all the time. I'm sure mr donkey will meet his doom in perfect time.
The touched abbi then smiles at wooldoor. Toot then frantically walks around the household.
Toot:(Panicking) I'm not in the fat shed anymore. I'm... (Sees the party cake) Not... (Starts devouring the cake in stress. The housemates then watch toot in sadness and remorse.
Foxxy:(Angrily at the housemates) Look at what Y'all did. Ya bullied toot for her weight and now she's lost her mind after entering that crazy show. Y'all aughta be ashamed of yourselves.
Xandir:(Tears up) Oh, Poor toot!
Spanky:(Starts to cry) This can't possibly get any sadder.
The flying stair master suddenly falls through the roof of the household and lands on abbi which crushes and critically injures her.
Housemates: Abbi!!
Hero:(Panicking) Oh no!! Not "What's his name"!
Wooldoor:(Runs over to abbi) Abbi, Don't worry! Let me help you! (Tries to lift the stair master which makes abbi cry in pain.)
Abbi: I know you mean well, Wooldoor but this is just making me feel worse!
Foxxy:(Urgently) Everybody give a helping hand!
The housemates soon lift the stair master off of abbi. Wooldoor then gently holds her as sad violin music plays.
Wooldoor:(In tears) Abbi! Speak to me! Are you okay?
Abbi:(Weakly) I apologize for telling you this, But... I think I'm done for...
Wooldoor:(Tearful) Abbi, Please don't die! Is there anything I could do?
Abbi:(Weakly smiling) Wooldoor, Thank you for everything you did for me while I was here. You were the first decent male individual that I've met since my father.
Wooldoor:(Starts to cry) Oh abbi!
Abbi: And Wooldoor? Out of curiosity, Does that depraved superhero like to have sexual intercourse with deceased individuals as well?
Wooldoor: Big time.
Abbi: In that case, Could you keep my body away from him?
Wooldoor:(Softly) I will.
Abbi:(Weakly smiles at wooldoor in appreciation) Much obliged... (Dies in wooldoor's arms which makes him and the rest of the housemates weep.)
Later, The tearful and sniffling wooldoor carries to lifeless abbi to her bed and puts her blanket over her.
Wooldoor:(Forlorn) Abbi, If you don't come back by the next episode, I just wanna say thank you for being my new friend. (Softly cries) I'll miss you...
Later on, Xandir heads downstairs and sees toot in her old fat self in the kitchen.
Xandir:(Sympathetic) Hey toot. I'm sorry the fat shed didn't work out for you.
Toot:(Smiles and shrugs at xandir) Hey, It's better to be the fat girl than the girl who kissed wooldoor like abbi.
Xandir:(Shocked) Wait, Abbi kissed wooldoor?
END